{"id":301864,"date":"1987-01-01T00:01:06","date_gmt":"1986-12-31T23:01:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.vanoorschot.nl\/dbnl\/c-o-jellema\/"},"modified":"2021-06-04T15:08:15","modified_gmt":"2021-06-04T14:08:15","slug":"c-o-jellema","status":"publish","type":"dbnl","link":"https:\/\/www.vanoorschot.nl\/en\/dbnl\/c-o-jellema\/","title":{"rendered":"C.O. Jellema"},"content":{"rendered":"
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[p. 623]<\/div>\r\n<\/a>\r\n

\r\nC.O. Jellema<\/i>\r\n<\/h3>\r\n\r\n

Terhorst<\/h4>\r\n\r\n
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Altijd zoek ik hier wat ik vind: het dennen-<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Bos, de heideplas met de meeuwen. Jaren<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Later. Altijd kom ik om haar die moeder<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Voor mijn gedachten<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Was, de plaatsvervangende, naamloos, eisend<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Niets: natuur, bevrijdend ook vroeger mij van<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Plicht. Gewichtloos lijkt nu die plicht, een kind valt<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Zwaar ook het kindzijn.<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Zweeg zij toen ook? Zijn mijn gedachten veilig?<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Kijkend naar een rups, op het zandpad hurkend,<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Dacht ik niet, want blik werd beweging en geen<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Tijd die voorbijging:<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Ogenblik – het later nooit zo beleefde -,<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Zijn wordt kijken, helder bewustzijn, droomloos;<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Rustend ligt die ene beweging open<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Onder de hemel,<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Ordent in mijn aandacht de ruimte. – Jaren<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Later breng ik wat ik hier vind terug als<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Vond ik het opnieuw. Aan de scheefgegroeide<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Vliegden, die vroeger<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Schuilplaats was, herken ik herinnering. Want<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Kijken is al beeldspraak. – Maar mooi blijft in de<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Plas nog met de meeuwen hoe roerloos zich de<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Hemel weerspiegelt.<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n

Uit: De toren van Snelson<\/i> (Amsterdam 1983)<\/p>\r\n\r\n

[p. 624]<\/div>\r\n

Terhorst<\/h4>\r\n\r\n
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Liet ik jou iets zien: de jeneverbessen,<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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van de hei ‘t geblevene, hier de paden<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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die ik ken. De ware. Want wat ik zie<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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is niet te bekijken.<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Toegevoegd nu jij aan de beelden, dierbaar<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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beeld, gedacht ook vroeger in deze sc\u00e8ne<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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reeds, al was niet jij het en niemand die ik<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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kende dan dromend.<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Nam ik jou wel waar? Gaat het mij niet steeds weer<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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om herdenking? Zo de jeneverbessen,<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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zwijgend dicht bijeen, nu herinnerd zonder<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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jou pas ondenkbaar.<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Waarom zwijgend? Vorm in zichzelf, gestalte,<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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zomer, winter, niets te verliezen, zoals<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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bomen blad, – hun blijvend gelijk, gerede<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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vorm voor gedachten.<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Komen in de schemer tot leven, lijken<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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sprekend dat wat ik in hen vrees, mijn eigen<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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angst van toen, van kind voor het raam, de wereld<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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duister daar buiten.<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Ben jij zo ook? Enkel de vorm waarin ik<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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denk? Verander jij in de schemering straks<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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ook? Als ik, dan weer voor een raam, de angsten<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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ken voor het vreemde –<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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Wie ben jij dan, wat had ik lief in jou toen<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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wij daar waren, ik jou liet zien de hei, maar<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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welke, paden, welke – want nooit zal ik door<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n
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jouw ogen kijken.<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n

Uit: In de koude voorjaarsnacht<\/i> (Amsterdam 1986)<\/p>\r\n\r\n<\/div>

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Over dit hoofdstuk\/artikel<\/h3>\n

C.O. Jellema<\/a><\/p>\n
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[p. 623] C.O. Jellema Terhorst \u00a0 Altijd zoek ik hier wat ik vind: het dennen- \u00a0 Bos, de heideplas met de meeuwen. Jaren \u00a0 Later. Altijd kom ik om haar die moeder \u00a0 Voor mijn gedachten \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Was, de plaatsvervangende, naamloos, eisend \u00a0 Niets: natuur, bevrijdend ook vroeger mij van \u00a0 Plicht. Gewichtloos… Lees verder <\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","class_list":["post-301864","dbnl","type-dbnl","status-publish","hentry"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nC.O. Jellema · Uitgeverij Van Oorschot<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.vanoorschot.nl\/en\/dbnl\/c-o-jellema\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"C.O. 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